Just mADE A PArabola og urine
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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