Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
