I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
