Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
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