Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
