ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
