I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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