no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
