He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
