girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
