Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
