My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
