did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
