I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Randomize
