You smell like a Billy Joel song
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
