I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
