The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
