Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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