It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
