totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
