Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Randomize
