Don't you send me to vm
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
