I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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