But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Buhtt sex?
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
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