at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize