Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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