Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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