We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Randomize
