It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
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