i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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