I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
We left the knife in your bed.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
