I CAN MOONWALK!
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
