Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
