Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
