i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
We left the knife in your bed.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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