Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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