bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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