do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Randomize
