I woke up this morning with my shirt on upside down.
You mean inside out.
No, upside down. I ripped the neck hole in the process of getting it around my waist.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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