Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize