Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
