i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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