Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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