I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Randomize