he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
