4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
