we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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