Where is the hickey?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Randomize
