Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
