I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
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