thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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